I like me.

God has been revealing more of who He is to me and who He is calling us to be.

You are beautiful. (pass it on)
It's a simple truth. We are beautiful. If you don't think so then you need to look into some truths.
God created us in His image. So if we love God, then we love ourselves right?

I think often times we go about praising God and encouraging others and when we get alone or have those brief seconds to think of ourselves we shut off. We don't find ourselves to be good enough or something else ridiculous. But that's wrong. If we love God then we love ourselves. And if you don't then you're missing out on a lot of God to be loving. As people, as man, as humans, God has created us all uniquely in his spitting image. Ya we all look different and all have different personalities, but we ALL represent God. Just a different part of Him. So if we don't love ourselves then we aren't loving God.

It's like the artist. They just spent a whole week making this radical painting, for you of course. Only to make you happy, and they've poured out everything they have to offer into this painting, to present it to you. And you don't like it. In fact you forget all about the heart of it, and just look to pick it apart and put it down. We have just torn that piece of work and shown the creator no appreciation and no value of it.

We are God's creation, He poored everything He had to offer into the creation of us, and everything around us to please us, offering it all to us. Then we go and don't appreciate it. It's like saying to God that you don't appreciate Him that you're not thankful.

I've spent all weekend digging into this even more, and ironically spent a lot of the previous week thinking about this. Thinking about how we strive for more and changing this or we're not good enough, but the truth of everything, is to say God thank you. Thank you for creating me. I like me. I LOVE ME. And a lot of this of course is in a sense capping my process of this previous weekend, but I think it's so important. How can we love God if we don't love ourselves?

This is what I love about God. And I think this is where we fall short and where He longs for us to grasp. To love ourselves and be thankful of God for who He has made us to be. Nerd. Geek. Skater. whatever, God has hand made us and invested into creating us to look like Him. So we thank Him for creating us, but then we go one step further. We ask God to reveal to us our dreams. And we don't dream small oh no, we dream big, We go all out! If we are created in God's image, and His heart is to see His children return to Him, then pray that. Pray big, Dream big. There is example after example of God telling people to dream big, but because they don't love themselves, or think they are adequate, they question God and don't dream.

God asks Moses to lead His people out of Egypt. Moses didn't love himself, He didn't think He was adequate enough to do this. Pick Aaron He says. God's pretty much like, Shut up! I want you. I want you to trust me, believe me, dream in me, that I can use you like this. And Moses just doubts because He isn't secure in loving himself to trust God enough. He puts this cap on God, so God does miracles right in front of Him, like, NO JOKE MOSES, I want you! God is calling all of us out like Moses, we might not be leading a nation, but anything for the glory of the kingdom is just as valued.

Love ourselves, because that is loving God. Love God, and trust and appreciate and thank Him. Dream big, God has called us to dream big, to not put a limitation on who He is.

I like me. I'm dreaming big, I'm transforming, but I'm not putting a cap on how big God is.

Asking.

So I still don't have a job. But I do. I live life. I do a lot of odd jobs.

I've been trusting on the Lord so much as of late. I'm in this spot of being so dependent upon Him that I don't know what to do. I still don't have a job so of course one thing I am asking God is for provision. Provision financially. It's hard for me. I love to treat others. Buy them coffee, lunch, give them a ride, something. Lately it's been difficult though, I can't. in fact I'm on the other end, I am asking, or just passing up. It's a hard spot. Not that it's hard as though I struggle, but it's hard because God is transforming me. Transformation for the most part is hard, it takes work. Part of this work, involves me asking God. I ask Him for provision. I ask Him for everything. I dream big, I ask Him for outrageous things now.

I can see how this transformation is changing me. I am asking God for everything, sometimes I ask just because I know how big God is. But these questions, they're not all about me anymore. I was in this spot of asking God to help me. But I realized.... I don't need help... God is paving my path already, it's not as though He has put me on this unattainable, can't survive route. He provides for the birds doesn't He? These questions, me asking, it's not about me, God Help Me, no it's about others now, it's transformed. My vantage point has been broadened and is growing. A heart for youth, for nations, for friends, for family. I ask God for them. This is how I have already transformed.

I made this list. Five things... the first three, entirely impractical but it was out of discipline I guess. I asked God for: shoes... my laptop to get fixed... car stereo... I don't NEED these things, but if I can ask God for the salvation of friends or the redemption of nations, why can't I ask Him for other things? I really don't know how to explain it. It's not as though I'm like "God I want this or else." but it's like, "God, I am going to trust in you that I would like these things and can't swing a means of getting them now, so here you go, I'm done dwelling on them."....
I gave them up. It was a prayer. Here you go, I'm moving on, because this is overwhelming me. God provided...

But I said my consisted of five things. That was only three. I'll let you know when the other two come through, but that's God's timing not mine. This list, isn't a five things and I'm down, it's constantly growing, as I have revelation upon revelation about God. I will say that the remaining two on the five list I refer to is family, but that was A list, of an even larger list. I have been thinking about how Paul or Moses or David went about this. Asking God for things. Praying out our hearts, in manner as to not dwelling on it, but to give it up to the Lord. It's new. It's hard.

Transformation. It's hard. It's awkward. It's stressful. But we all go through it and it looks different every time. I'm transforming in a way of trusting in the Lord. Giving things up to Him as they come up to me. Ha and I just had the thought, of how ridiculous this sounds, like I'm just asking God for whatever thinking He's going to give it to me. Ya right (I say that to myself) God's good and faithful and He provides. In the mean time, I'll pray out and seek out what I feel led into.