Dream. Imagine. Create.

Salut!

2010-01-15T12:26:00.000-08:00

It's been a while for me to post anything, and well quite frankly even now I don't feel like writing too much. Here's a little update I reckon, not that I really intend for this to be a self serving purpose but I haven't seen many people lately so if just one person takes to this and digs it then I'm satisfied ha.

I've been working a lot lately, not as much as this time last year, but still quite a bit. Between Little Country Church doing graphic design, and Dutch Bros. "Saving Lives One Cup At A Time", I've been enjoying it.

Speaking of Little Country Here are a few pics of my most recent work that I've done. In Web Design. It's been fun, and really challenging trying to find a sense of uniqueness and originality.

I haven't been able to do much photography or much film lately, but that's ok by me. I'm satisfied just doing a different style of design lately.

Like I mentioned this is a quick and brief little update of what I've been up to lately, and some previews of what I've done.

Let me know what you think of the web designs ;)

Oh and we're reading through Crazy Love by Francis Chan... it's really good I am enjoying it.

Stay or Leave

2009-07-24T23:10:00.000-07:00

So this summer I've had a torn heart. I've been praying that God open doors for me to move down to Los Angeles to go to school at Citrus College and transfer over to Azusa Pacific in the Spring semester. However, a couple of weeks ago I challenged God to reveal his heart for me, to me, while I was in Mexico. I asked him to break down my walls, stir up my passions and desires, and the things my heart break for.... He did that.

So the question of "stay or leave?" arises. In my flesh, I assess the situation and see myself as an unprepared, poor, little kid. In my heart I see a person that is longing for more of Jesus and doesn't care what it takes to "do work" (fight the good fight).

When I was in Mexico I was privileged to film a lot of neat things around San Vicente, documenting parts of peoples lives forever! WOW so rad right?

It is so rad to me, film, design, photography, people, stories, dreams, that's my heart. That is what I want to be a part of forever. That is how I see God has gifted me, and I want to do that stuff to my best. When I was in San Vicente I was really trippin on LA whether I should go or not. I was, am still, so confused because of the variance in doors that are, have been, opening. People moving, jobs being created, visions being casted, offices changing, hearts being revealed to the glory of God. I look at that and I get lost in seeing where I fit in, or not.

My heart for LA was that of being able to go down, do school, and get to minister, and start a small group or something that was focusing on Jesus, knowing who our Savior is, exposing the honor and privilege we have to serve Him, and more. But I still am stuck know if that is this year or next.

While my heart here in Redding, is to go to school, and get to lead and minister to high schoolers and kids my age, to reveal the glory of God to them and of course even more to myself, to show them what living out of the box means. What it looks like, why we are supposed to, etc.

LA and Redding is such a similar heart, a similar focus, a focus that doesn't have a visible time frame, a direct answer.

I'm in this place where I feel as though I am not hearing the voice of the Lord for myself. His words to me, about me, for me. My prayer is that God reveals what he has for me in this immediate season, I don't want to concern myself with what comes next, I want to focus on the time at hand, and not worry about tomorrow, God I want to see you face to face, I want to hear you. God, I want to do work, I want to bring glory to the kingdom, I want to see life change, and not just surface change. I want to be apart of a revolution so intimate that it imitates the movement we read about in ACTS. I want to be a part of a group of leaders that are willing to go and do, not sit and talk about dreams and visions, but to act on them. I want to be a part of a generation that does work. Lord I want work.

Shorry, lil side prayer.

So ya if you read this and feel like the Lord is leading you to pray guidance for me, then please pray that the Lord will give me peace and direction that is unbias.

Mexico

2009-07-23T16:45:00.000-07:00

So I just got back from San Vicente, Baja Mexico. I really felt convicted to write something. I am just so awful bad at journaling. So I went down to Mexico last week with a team of 28 or so people I think. Ranging in ages from old to really young. We had the opportunity to host a festival for the town. The largest thing that town has ever seen.

As far as the festival went, it was real great. It was preceded by a lot of community work around town, repainting the school, jail, park, etc. the festival itself was made up of just a bunch of great fun and games for the children, air jumps and water slides just to let them have fun. All for free mind you. We got to make a bunch of bike jumps and had the privilege of hanging out with three guys from Murrieta (San Diego area, actually funny side story, the guys live down the street from the Pettengil family so we got to see them again on our way home) so the guys put on a fun bike demo and did some flips and spins if you know what I'm sayin, really getting the people pumped up. The last night of the festival we had a huge ministry night with worship and a message with a ministry time, kids falling on their knees in the glory of God. So awesome.

Like I had mentioned we did a lot of community work, it was a promise that was made to the community to just make improvements and build hope. So we did a lot of repainting, and moved a bunch of concrete. Hard work, tiring work, exhausting work. But it was soo good once we were done the people, so thankful for our work and really encouraged them to just see the hope in their city and start to play their parts in taking pride in their town.

Together with the community service and festival Dan Vallotton had organized and was getting a team to run a soccer tournament for the locals. A great tournament with a bunch of kids from all over. Imagine league soccer, but a tournament, on a dirt soccer feild, with no uniforms, kids playing in jeans and tshirts. But they were having a blast.

Aalllsssooo, we did a little volleyball thing, with the girls from our team versus sponsered team from Mexico, it was a humorous game, lets just say that it was just for fun... (we lost) haha.

Alright that's the practical stuff of what we did, the actual work that was done, but the real stuff we did, the lasting stuff, the spiritual stuff, the stuff that changed lives was so amazing.

In the morning our team would go to labor camps (camps where familys are given a place to live and payed a small salary for working at the vineyards, orchards, crops, etc. that are owned by companies) during the day, the adults go out and work the feilds and stuff while the kids stay back at the camps just hanging out with each other. We had the opportunity to go and hang out with these kids, play and have fun. Teach them bible lessons, and get them to smile. Lives were changed, not just lives of the kids, but of our team as well. God revelead himself in a way that many of the students on the team had never seen. And the glory of God was shown to the kids by us getting down in the dirt playing soccer, or basketball, or just holding them and racing and etc. the ultimate way of having fun with 30+ kids all at one time.

This all happened and the team was able to go to that, I however had the privilege to go around town and film. I was able to get video of the soccer tourny and the painting that was going on, and the guys riding bikes. The purpose of these videos was more than just for us. It was for me to make a 15-20 min video to play every night preceding the final night of the festival. It was such an honor to go and capture the lives of the people there and put it all together. and this, this is why it was an honor. I got to stand there and look out over 100+ sometimes a few hundred people, that stayed out after dark just to see my video. The video they were in, the video that wouldn't exist if they weren't there. Such an honor and privilege.

God did such good things with revealing the reality of walking in humility and being a servant. Talking with the team and praying with the team, I am just so encouraged to see them getting God, getting what it means to live outside of the box. I am so pumped about this outside of the box mentality. Like last year when I went to Australia God revealed to me what that means to be outside of the box. And I got it, I've been trying to walk in that and live that. And to see more people seeing that and wanting to walk in that oh wow, sooo good.

Speaking about people getting it, and wanting to live outside the box. Kayla Smith. WOW. God has done so much in her. Just to fill you in she's been doing a summer internship for Dan and Emalia Vallotton in San Vicente, and been the person leading these teams that come from all over to go to labor camps and stuff. But God has just rocked her soo much, allowed her to die to herself and to be renewed in him. Given her new life. It's so encouraging to see, and so exciting to see her walk in the fullness of God, and be entirely dependent on the Spirit and God for everything. She still has a few more weeks left so be praying for her that between now and when she gets back she is able to continue to build on that, and that when she gets back, she is able to come back and stay out of the box, and not get into routine of life, and is able to continue to stay strong in her ministry and passion for doing work for God.

This is similar to the prayer I have for my team, that they will be able to stay in that place of being passionate for people and doing work and revealing God to people, friends, family. Also, to stay strong in their walk and stay passionate about seeking out seeing God face to face.

There's way more, but this is good enough for me to remember this week for a long time.

Wesley Jensen

2009-02-19T17:08:00.000-08:00

I've been working on a myspace layout for Wesley Jensen and the Wildcats. Interesting how a band name can change and transform and develop. It's fun. Anyways, I've been working on the layout in the little time I have available and it has been fun, I never really did any trick things to myspace layouts usually just colors and background so this is a whole new ball game but it has been fun and educating.

Not much self creating...

2009-02-11T23:36:00.000-08:00

So I've come to this realization as of late. I have been taking a lot of photos recently, and just expanding my portfolio and my knowledge, however, I have nothing of myself.

Friends, buildings, grass, birds, trees, snow, cars, bikes, sunsets, mountains, dogs, LEGO's... I don't know, just stuff. BUT I have nothing of myself it's sort of ridiculous, and sort of funny.

It makes me kind of sad, but it motivates me. So sometime in the next few weeks I'm going to be experimenting with my new camera and a tripod, so it should be fun. By the way if any one is interested in hanging out and letting me take photos of them... like not in a weird way just for me to add to my portfolio... let me know!

Reality.

2009-01-29T13:20:00.000-08:00

Real Men. Real Women. Real Children. Real People. Real Lives. Real Stories. Real.

In the last few weeks I've been stepping back and doing a lot of thinking, and spending a lot of time with JC. As I step back and watch and think and analyze, I can not avoid this reality that we live in. Hundreds, Thousands, Millions of people all over the world breathing, walking, living, making decisions, being dumb, being serious. It's incredible. My wind just keeps getting blow. I think on a personal scale of stuff that happens in this city to the people I know, the people I live with, the people I walk with, the people I bike with, the people I make coffee for, the people at my church.

Shelby Allen, a girl, a family, a holiday, a future, gone. Decisions, anticipation, routine, boredom, stuff... stuff that can dramatically change the course of history.

Jake Henrich, a boy, a team, a family, a dream, gone. Longing for someone to value him, for stability in life. Things that we can all identify with and long for as well.

Dustin Brown, a boy, a future, an expectation, gone. Longing for appreciation, affirmation, encouragement, and someone to love him. Things that we all need to live and make us stronger.

The man I passed riding my bike the other day in down town. The man and woman sitting on the corner. The man and wife that just decided which dog they are going to get to live in their new home. The little girl that just learned 2+2. The little boy that is astonished by how powerful the wind can get. The woman that teaches a class and struggles with acceptance of her own family and past. These are all people, all stories, all futures, all pasts, that effect me every day. There story could change my story forever.

I met a man in Australia. Well I stayed in his house for a night while he was gone. Then a few weeks later when he got back I met him. In those few weeks of being Australia I learned more about myself, about who I want to become, what I want to do, how I want to get there. I may have learned this but I don't know how God is bringing me to arrive there. These dreams I had, i share with thousands, if not millions. To help and encourage, to support, to affirm, to build confidence, to challenge, to assist, to brighten and bring hope. This man who I had stayed at his house, he shares that dream. He wants to bring an end to injustices. Human trafficking is a primary focus of his, where God has led him. He goes to places of high traffic and exposes this injustice through film, photography, painting, and his words, to people all over the world. This is the kind of man I want to become.

I was thinking the other day... what if cartoons got saved... not really, but I was thinking that I am 18 and in the worlds eye's I NEED to go to school, and I NEED to drive this car, and I NEED to have this much money, and I NEED to do this and that. From this thought I step back and think not about what I need, but what can I give. What can I do to help someone get there. But not get to the THERE that the world is thinking. But the THERE that we truly long for on a personal level.

THERE: to be loved, to be valued, to be appreciated. To have someone listen to us. To have someone encourage us. To have someone that pushes us towards brighter things. To be sheltered from the elements. To have food to keep us healthy.

I, when I think of this, I think of who has everything to offer that. It's JC, he longs to offer just one of those things to us all the time... and if He can He wants to hook it up with all of that. And being that we are made and designed in His image, and we are longing to be more like Him, that means that we are graced and privilaged to provide that for everyone or as many as we can. In simple things. I think that it is the simple things that show value to people.

I have a friend he wants to make movies. Maybe I don't know really, but it is one of his dreams. To make films that utilize these actors that are made up of people that stand out in communitys, in clicks, in groups. The people that are the more bold ones that people watch and listen. He takes these people and puts them in this film that is written about some underlining story that God has given him, to bring glory to the kingdom, with the Father's children!

I want to design shirts and prints and make websites and take photos and make short films to bring glory to the kingdom to support people to encourage people, and bring glory to the kingdom. To provide a message that lifts people up and I can just play my part in becoming more like the Father.

I don't know really, I just wrote this with a lot of stuff going on around me and that just adds more to this idea of real people, real lives, real stories, and real fun!

It's been a while.

2009-01-07T22:49:00.000-08:00

It's been a while since I just wrote. I've been so busy lately. I don't even know if it's good busy.

I've been training at Dutch Bros., going to be a night guy at 4 corners shop. I am excited to have a solid job like that again. My job at the church is way fun but it's a different kind of job that I think I have too many privileges that it's hard to really see it as a JOB. It's more of this thing that I already do, but now I'm getting paid for it. Can't complain I guess.

School starts next week for me. It's going to be fun... I think. I have classes with a bunch of friends so that will be fun however school in and of itself, not my most desirable means of spending my time at the moment. Altogether, it will be fine I believe.

A lot has been happening for me lately. I am taking ownership of becoming more independent. I am now on my own cell phone plan, taking full responsibility for payments and such. I just got my first credit card to start developing credit. Also, I'm starting to save... with intent. I was thinking the other day, just about things that I know God takes care of in the long run, but I think it's still wise to plan and anticipate certain things. So saving came up, and I was like but save for what? School, fun, maybe rent one day, my future wife... Just stuff that well I guess if I start saving now it will prevent stress in the future. Which is so nice.

Today was a good day, it seemed really long. Work at 8, until 12. Then to the church from 1-5. It's been like that a lot lately, so I'm just tired and worn down. I'm ready for a break, to sleep in and feel rested. But I think I'm going into a new season with different things to look forward to, different things to be accountable for, different relationship to be mended and in some cases, built. Welcome to 2009 right?

I just realized, well sort of realized that, some people when they write blogs they try and sound all proper, and some people write as though they were talking, or some find a medium. I don't know how I write... I think it changes dependent upon how much energy I have.

I like me.

2008-10-14T22:18:00.000-07:00

God has been revealing more of who He is to me and who He is calling us to be.

You are beautiful. (pass it on)
It's a simple truth. We are beautiful. If you don't think so then you need to look into some truths.
God created us in His image. So if we love God, then we love ourselves right?

I think often times we go about praising God and encouraging others and when we get alone or have those brief seconds to think of ourselves we shut off. We don't find ourselves to be good enough or something else ridiculous. But that's wrong. If we love God then we love ourselves. And if you don't then you're missing out on a lot of God to be loving. As people, as man, as humans, God has created us all uniquely in his spitting image. Ya we all look different and all have different personalities, but we ALL represent God. Just a different part of Him. So if we don't love ourselves then we aren't loving God.

It's like the artist. They just spent a whole week making this radical painting, for you of course. Only to make you happy, and they've poured out everything they have to offer into this painting, to present it to you. And you don't like it. In fact you forget all about the heart of it, and just look to pick it apart and put it down. We have just torn that piece of work and shown the creator no appreciation and no value of it.

We are God's creation, He poored everything He had to offer into the creation of us, and everything around us to please us, offering it all to us. Then we go and don't appreciate it. It's like saying to God that you don't appreciate Him that you're not thankful.

I've spent all weekend digging into this even more, and ironically spent a lot of the previous week thinking about this. Thinking about how we strive for more and changing this or we're not good enough, but the truth of everything, is to say God thank you. Thank you for creating me. I like me. I LOVE ME. And a lot of this of course is in a sense capping my process of this previous weekend, but I think it's so important. How can we love God if we don't love ourselves?

This is what I love about God. And I think this is where we fall short and where He longs for us to grasp. To love ourselves and be thankful of God for who He has made us to be. Nerd. Geek. Skater. whatever, God has hand made us and invested into creating us to look like Him. So we thank Him for creating us, but then we go one step further. We ask God to reveal to us our dreams. And we don't dream small oh no, we dream big, We go all out! If we are created in God's image, and His heart is to see His children return to Him, then pray that. Pray big, Dream big. There is example after example of God telling people to dream big, but because they don't love themselves, or think they are adequate, they question God and don't dream.

God asks Moses to lead His people out of Egypt. Moses didn't love himself, He didn't think He was adequate enough to do this. Pick Aaron He says. God's pretty much like, Shut up! I want you. I want you to trust me, believe me, dream in me, that I can use you like this. And Moses just doubts because He isn't secure in loving himself to trust God enough. He puts this cap on God, so God does miracles right in front of Him, like, NO JOKE MOSES, I want you! God is calling all of us out like Moses, we might not be leading a nation, but anything for the glory of the kingdom is just as valued.

Love ourselves, because that is loving God. Love God, and trust and appreciate and thank Him. Dream big, God has called us to dream big, to not put a limitation on who He is.

I like me. I'm dreaming big, I'm transforming, but I'm not putting a cap on how big God is.

Asking.

2008-10-14T21:48:00.000-07:00

So I still don't have a job. But I do. I live life. I do a lot of odd jobs.

I've been trusting on the Lord so much as of late. I'm in this spot of being so dependent upon Him that I don't know what to do. I still don't have a job so of course one thing I am asking God is for provision. Provision financially. It's hard for me. I love to treat others. Buy them coffee, lunch, give them a ride, something. Lately it's been difficult though, I can't. in fact I'm on the other end, I am asking, or just passing up. It's a hard spot. Not that it's hard as though I struggle, but it's hard because God is transforming me. Transformation for the most part is hard, it takes work. Part of this work, involves me asking God. I ask Him for provision. I ask Him for everything. I dream big, I ask Him for outrageous things now.

I can see how this transformation is changing me. I am asking God for everything, sometimes I ask just because I know how big God is. But these questions, they're not all about me anymore. I was in this spot of asking God to help me. But I realized.... I don't need help... God is paving my path already, it's not as though He has put me on this unattainable, can't survive route. He provides for the birds doesn't He? These questions, me asking, it's not about me, God Help Me, no it's about others now, it's transformed. My vantage point has been broadened and is growing. A heart for youth, for nations, for friends, for family. I ask God for them. This is how I have already transformed.

I made this list. Five things... the first three, entirely impractical but it was out of discipline I guess. I asked God for: shoes... my laptop to get fixed... car stereo... I don't NEED these things, but if I can ask God for the salvation of friends or the redemption of nations, why can't I ask Him for other things? I really don't know how to explain it. It's not as though I'm like "God I want this or else." but it's like, "God, I am going to trust in you that I would like these things and can't swing a means of getting them now, so here you go, I'm done dwelling on them."....
I gave them up. It was a prayer. Here you go, I'm moving on, because this is overwhelming me. God provided...

But I said my consisted of five things. That was only three. I'll let you know when the other two come through, but that's God's timing not mine. This list, isn't a five things and I'm down, it's constantly growing, as I have revelation upon revelation about God. I will say that the remaining two on the five list I refer to is family, but that was A list, of an even larger list. I have been thinking about how Paul or Moses or David went about this. Asking God for things. Praying out our hearts, in manner as to not dwelling on it, but to give it up to the Lord. It's new. It's hard.

Transformation. It's hard. It's awkward. It's stressful. But we all go through it and it looks different every time. I'm transforming in a way of trusting in the Lord. Giving things up to Him as they come up to me. Ha and I just had the thought, of how ridiculous this sounds, like I'm just asking God for whatever thinking He's going to give it to me. Ya right (I say that to myself) God's good and faithful and He provides. In the mean time, I'll pray out and seek out what I feel led into.

House Sitting

2008-09-16T17:43:00.000-07:00

So my little brother went with his dad to the east coast to visit their family in Boston/ Martha's Vineyard. Steve, my little brother (Conner)'s dad, asked me to house sit and just watch over the house while they were gone.

So for a whole week it was like I was living on my own. The house is up in West Redding out off of Placer; and being that I am unemployed still, paying for gas to drive back and forth from west redding and shasta view area is not worth it. Not saying I didn't go to church or college group or school, but it was more of a well if I'm coming into town, I'm going to hang out in town and once I go to the house I'm staying at the house. Sort of exciting? Not really haha.

It was cool though just to have a lot of time to myself and just talking with God. There was a lot of, I don't know if you would say catching up, but more of a focus I guess on getting where I needed to be with God.

It was real nice, I would wake up and go for a swim then just sit in the sun until I was dry just listening to worship music, focusing on the words and what they are trying to stir up as far as truths. At night I would do something similar, go for a swim, take a shower and just sit and spend time with God before falling asleep.

I miss that. It was something that I got to do a lot in Australia that I haven't really been doing, or been able to do since I've been home. Being able to just not have a real agenda and just spend time with God. It so crucial, and I can notice a difference in myself as well as my relationship with God you know.

And this last week was just cool too, I have started designing stuff again, it's been a while since I've just set and let my creativity go. I think there might be a corrolation between my creativity and my relationship with God? who knows? haha.

Best part hands downt though of the week was the opportunity to do worship with Luke and Whitney at the Jr. High retreat at the Burroughs, I don't really know I just love hanging out with those guys and then to be able to do worship and stuff to, just so rad.

Not too eventful of a week, just a lot of hanging out at the house ha.

Welcome home?

2008-08-22T16:59:00.000-07:00

The Andy Griffith Show... ha, just the good ol' days I reckon'.

So I've been back for two weeks now. My first week back was just a really well enlightening.

A seat far too small for a fourteen hour flight. Cold stale air, that you just know everyone else in the plane has already used. The seatbelt light comes on. Wheels touch the ground. Fresh air enters all everybodies lungs, there's a sense of relief and joy that you get when you land.

It was on the up and up. We/I just landed after being in Australia for an amazing month. God had rocked my world, and brought me home stoked, looking forward to the future. Driving home, we had started the drive home, and was ringing my dad to figure out things for pick up.

Well in the conversation with my dad, he shared with me some family things that had happened while I was away. Just stuff with my mom, kind of shady, but God does all things for our good right? Anyway, all this joy and relief of being home, swiped away. I would have given anything to go back to Australia and be oblivious to what was going down. Not now though, I'm glad to be home. Anyway, ya I'd been home, well not even home, just in the states for lest then two hours and Satan was already doing his works to tear me down after my trip. But God is bigger than that, and we are able to rejoice in him regardless of what situations happen in our lives.

God just reminded me of Job, and Hosea, and David, and countless others that endured just really cruddy stuff. But God is faithful and worthy of our praise regardless.

Dead grass, smokey air, a climate change. I was tired and feeling sick, and just weighted with this news.

Detox. Sleep. American food. American water. A lot of prayer. Lengthy conversations with family members.

Life was different. Chapter 2008-2009 has started. This might be kind of sad, but no worries there's good in it. There's joy and praise. I'm excited to be home, looking forward to movement and new ministries, and college. New friends. Well it's good hard to deal with my mom situation but God does have it in control.

New to this world.

2008-08-21T13:38:00.000-07:00

I'm new to this whole world of blogging. It's not my thing, or maybe it is? How could I tell if I never try it right?
Anyway, lets see I reckon' a good way to go about kickin' this off would be to say what's up?

Well I went to Australia for a month or so, on a misisons trip. We stayed with YWAM, my team of 8 from Little Country Church Youth Group. It was a life changing experience.

The biggest thing that God revealed to me was the reality of the freedom we have been give through grace. Which is all spawned from His love, which we choose to receive through faith.

But ya, He gave me this analogy. It's like, how do you act when you walk with someone famous? Or how would you act? Say you're walking with Will Smith. You're going to be walking with this attitude of check this out, check ME out. Wanting everyone to know who you are with. But the reality of this is, that we are walking with God, who is way cooler, way more powerful, way more awesome than any famous person, as cool as they may be. So with this truth of "hey, I'm walking with God!", it's like how could we stay quiet and live our lives just average Joe style? We have to walk with this freedom and this radicalness to show people what we have. God.

That was the biggest thing for me to see in Australia. Oh and there was this one instant that stands out among others, when I applied it. We had gone out evangelizing for the day and were coming back home riding the bus. And for the most part you get on the bus or train and go home, and it's like "oh ok, job over we're done for the day" but the truth, no! we're never done. So I'm standing holding the rail and I start chatting with this dude, this Aussie veteran about life and stuff. We shared some stories about Fort Bragg, CA... it's a coastal city down south a little ways. And somehow it transitioned to Jesus talk, what is christianity la-duh-da. And the guy asks me, "so what has God done for you?"... haha, oh man was he in for it now. He had no idea what he was in store for.

I respond to this man that I never honestly got his name, unfortunately. I say to him how for starters he brought me half way across the world at 17 years old to talk to him, this guy. And continued with more examples of God blessings to me. He was flabbergasted. I had a response to his question, that wasn't the average, well, He died for my sins and He loves me. Which is true, but like there is so much more super personal stuff that God has done for all of us. So I shared that with Him, just several things and he sits there kind of confused, and stammers out the words "this is your stop" and looks away. It was a good experience to walk in freedom and not care about being judged you know?

I'll save the next blog for what's happened since I've been back. That's rather extensive surprising how much could happen in a couple weeks.